Islaamic Guidelines when a person dies

by Asma bint Shameem

🔹1. Once a person dies, they should close his eyes.

📌Proof:

🍃Umm Salamah said:

"The Messenger of Allaah Sal Allaahu Alaiyhi wa Sallam came to see Abu Salamah when his sight had become fixed (he had passed away).

So the Prophet Sal Allaahu Alaiyhi wa Sallam closed his eyes and said: 'When the soul is seized and it leaves the body, the eyes follow it.” (Muslim)

🔹2. Those present should make duaa and say only that which is good.

📌 Proof:

🍃When Abu Salamah died, some of his family wept and wailed. So the Prophet sal Allaahu Alayhi wa sallam said:

“Pray to Allaah only for good for yourselves, because the angels (who are present) say "Ameen" to whatever you utter.'

Then he said: 'O Allaah! Forgive Abu Salamah; raise his station among those who are rightly-guided; and take good care of his family that he has left behind. O Lord of the Worlds! Forgive him and us, make his grave spacious, and put light therein for him." (Muslim and others)

So we can make the same duaa:

اللهُـمِّ اغْفِـرْ لِـفلان (باسـمه) وَارْفَعْ دَرَجَتَـهُ في المَهْـدِييـن ، وَاخْـلُفْـهُ في عَقِـبِهِ في الغابِـرين، وَاغْفِـرْ لَنـا وَلَـهُ يا رَبَّ العـالَمـين، وَافْسَـحْ لَهُ في قَبْـرِهِ وَنَـوِّرْ لَهُ فيه

Allaahumma’ghfir li (name of the person) warfa` darajatahu fi ‘l-mahdiyyeen, wakhlufhu fī `aqibihi fi ‘l-ghaabireen, wagh’fir-lanaa wa lahu yaa Rabba ‘l-‘aalameen, wafsaḥ lahu fee qabrihi wa nawwir lahu feeh.

O Allaah, forgive [name of the person] and elevate his station among those who are guided.

Send him along the path of those who came before, and forgive us and him, O Lord of the worlds.

Enlarge for him his grave, and shed light upon him in it.”

(Saheeh Muslim 2/634)

🔹3. The deceased should be washed and shrouded

Basically washing the deceased male or female is through the following steps.

It can be done this way or any other way as long as water reaches all over the body and nothing remains dry.

a. First cover the body with a sheet so that it's not exposed.

b. Put on gloves and wash the private parts by pouring water over the area.

c. Do wudhu for the person who passed away like we make wudhu.

Wipe over the mouth and nose with water, wash the face and arms, wipe the head and ears, and wash the feet.

d. Mix water with some lote tree leaves (sidr) and pour this water over the head, then over the right side, then over the left side, then pour water all over the body.

If lote tree leaves are not available then we can use soap etc.

e. Repeat this three times or if needed five or seven.

It's better to do it an odd number of times.

f. When washing for the last time, it's good to add camphor to the water to add some pleasant fragrance.

g. Next braid the woman's hair into 3 braids

h. Shroud the deceased and apply camphor as perfume to the body.

🔹4. They should hasten to bury the deceased and not wait too long for relatives etc to arrive from overseas

📌 Proof:

🍃The Prophet sal Allaahu Alayhi wa sallam said:

‘Hasten to bury the deceased, for if he was righteous, then you are taking him to something good, and if he was otherwise, then it is an evil of which you are relieving yourselves.” (al-Bukhaari, Muslim)

🔹5. It’s allowed for the wife to wash her husband and the husband to wash his wife.

📌Proof:

🍃 Our Mother Aaishah radhi Allaahu anhaa said:

“The Messenger of Allaah Sal Allaahu Alaiyhi wa Sallam came back from a funeral in al-Baqee‘ and I had a headache and was saying, Oh my head.

He said, “Rather, I should say, Oh my head. It will not matter if you die before me, for I will wash you and shroud you, then I will offer the funeral prayer for you and bury you.” (Ahmad, 25380; Ibn Maajah, 1456; saheeh by al-Albaani)

🍃 Ash-Shawkaani said:

“The words of the Prophet sal Allaahu Alayhi wa sallam, “for I will wash you”, indicate that a wife may be washed by her husband if she dies.” (Nayl al-Awtaar, 4/35)

🍃 Shaikh ibn Baaz said:

“It is OK for a woman to wash her husband if she is knows how to do that. ‘Ali radhi Allaahu anhu washed his wife Fatimah radhi Allaahu anhaa and Asmaa bint ‘Umays washed her husband Abu Bakr al-Siddeeq radhi Allaahu anhu.”

(Majmoo’ Fataawa Wa Maqaalaat Mutanawwi’ah Li Samaahat Vol. 13, P. 107)

🔹 6. It’s preferred that the face is covered after death but it’s PERMISSIBLE to uncover it and see his face if the family wants to see it.

And it could be both before as well as after shrouding.

But the face should not be uncovered once the body is placed in the grave.

As for a woman, it’s better to cover her face and only her mahrams can see it if they want to do that.

📌 Proof:

🍃 Abu Bakr radhi Allaahu anhu kissed the face of the Prophet sal Allaahu Alayhi wa sallam after his death and some Sahaabah (for example Jaabir radhi Allaahu anhu) saw the face of their deceased loved ones to kiss them and the Prophet sal Allaahu Alayhi wa sallam did not stop them from looking and uncovering their face.

🍃 Ibn Qudaamah said:

“If his family want to see him, they should not be prevented. That is because of the report from Jaabir who said:

“When my father was killed, I started to lift the cloth from his face whilst I was weeping, and the Prophet Sal Allaahu Alaiyhi wa Sallam did not forbid me to do that.”

And Aa’ishah radhi Allaahu anhaa

said:

“I saw the Messenger of Allah

Sal Allaahu Alaiyhi wa Sallam

kiss ‘Uthmaan ibn Maz‘oon after he died, and I even saw his tears flowing. And she said:

“Abu Bakr came to see the Prophet Sal Allaahu Alaiyhi wa Sallam when he was wrapped in a striped cloak [after he died]. He uncovered his face, then he leaned over him and kissed him, then he wept and said: May my father be sacrificed for you, O Prophet of Allaah; Allah will not cause you to die twice.”These hadiths are saheeh.”

(al-Mughni (2/350)

🔹 7. There should be no wailing, screaming or lamenting for the dead.

📌 Proof:

🍃 The Prophet sal Allaahu Alayhi wa sallam said:

“There are four things in my ummah from the jaahiliyyah which they will not give up: pride in one’s ancestry, slandering the lineage of others, seeking rain from the stars and wailing over the dead. If the woman who wails does not repent before she dies, she will be raised on the Day of Resurrection wearing a garment of tar and a shirt of scabs.’ (Muslim al-Janaa’iz, 1550).

🔹 8. There’s no need to wear black or special clothes for mourning.

Rather any ordinary clothes can be worn.

🍃Shaikh Ibn Uthaymeen said:

“Wearing black at times of calamity is a wrong custom that has no basis” (Majallah Al-Da’wah, No. 1789, P. 60)

🔹 9. You can throw three handful of dirt when burying the deceased.

That’s what the Prophet ﷺ did.

🍃 Abu Hurayrah Radhi Allaahu anhu said:

“Once, the Messenger of Allaah ﷺ performed the funeral prayer on a deceased (Muslim) and then came to his grave and threw three handfuls of dirt at the direction of his head.” (Ibn Maajah: Saheeh)

🍃 Ibn Qudaamah said :

“It is narrated from Ahmad that he attended a funeral procession and, when earth was put over the dead, he stood toward the grave and threw three handfuls of dirt on it and then returned to his place and said, commenting: ‘This is handed down from ‘Ali in an authentic narration, that he threw handfuls of dirt on the grave of Ibn Mukaffaf.”

(Al-Mughni)

But keep in mind that there’s no proof of any dhikr or duaa to be said when throwing dirt.

Anything that you hear regarding that is not proven from the authentic sources.

🔹10. Nothing should be read of the Qur’aan.

There’s NO PROOF that Surah al-Faatihah or Yaseen or any other part of the Qur’aan be read for the dying or deceased.

Rather we should make duaa for the deceased.

📌 Proof:

🍃 Shaikh Ibn Baaz said regarding reading Qur’aan for the deceased:

“There is NO REPORT in the Holy Qur’aan or in the Sunnah of the Messenger of Allaah Sal Allaahu Alaiyhi wa Sallam, or from his companions to indicate that it is prescribed to give one's reading of Qur’aan (or the reward thereof) to one's parents or to anyone else.

Rather Allaah has enjoined reading Qur’aan so that one may BENEFIT from it, LEARN from it, PONDER its meanings and ACT upon it.

If giving the reward for reading to another was permissible or prescribed, the righteous salaf would have done it.

It is NOT PERMISSIBLE to make ANALOGIES with regard to acts of worship, because they can ONLY be proven by a text from the Book of Allaah Subhaanahu wa Ta’aala or the Sunnah of His Prophet Sal Allaahu Alaiyhi wa Sallam, because of the hadeeth quoted above and other similar reports.”

(Majmoo’ Fataawa al-Shaykh Ibn Baaz, 8/360, 361)

🔹 11. Duaa should be made for the deceased INDIVIDUALLY and NOT collectively in a group.

There’s no proof from the practice of the Prophet Sal Allaahu Alaiyhi wa Sallam that he or his Sahaabah ever got together as an ‘organized’ event to offer duaa collectively after anyone passed away.

When someone amongst them passed away, the Prophet sal Allaahu Alayhi wa sallam and his Sahaabah would bury them then the Prophet sal Allaahu Alayhi wa sallam would encourage them to make duaa for the deceased.

However, they did so INDIVIDUALLY.

And NOT as a group.

🍃 Uthmaan ibn ‘Affaan radhi Allaahu anhu said:

“When the Prophet Sal Allaahu Alaiyhi wa Sallam had finished burying a deceased person, he would stand over him and say: “Pray for forgiveness for your brother, and ask that he be made steadfast, for he is being questioned now.” (Abu Dawood - saheeh by al-Albaani)

🍃 Shaykh Ibn Uthaymeen was asked about gathering together to make duaa as a group when someone dies.

He said:

“This is not part of the Sunnah of the Messenger Sal Allaahu Alaiyhi wa Sallam or the way of the Rightly-Guided Caliphs (may Allaah be pleased with them), rather the Messenger Sal Allaahu Alaiyhi wa Sallam used to tell them to pray for forgiveness for the deceased and ask for him to be made steadfast, INDIVIDUALLY and not together.” (Fataawa al-Janaa’iz, p. 228)

🔹 12. As for gathering at the masjid or at the house to receive condolences, there’s a difference of opinion among the scholars about that.

Some of the scholars including Shaykh Ibn ‘Uthaymeen are of the view that it’s not allowed to gather at a specific place to receive condolences because that was not the practice of the Prophet ﷺ.

But other scholars including Shaykh Ibn Baaz said that it is permissible to receive condolences in this way.

🍃Shaykh Ibn Baaz said:

“I do not see anything wrong with the one who has suffered the calamity of the death of a relative or wife and the like receiving people in his house who have come to offer condolences at an appropriate time, because offering condolences is Sunnah, and receiving those who have come to offer condolences is something that helps them to fulfil the Sunnah.

And if they honor them by offering coffee or tea or perfume, all of that is fine.“

(Majmoo‘ Fataawa wa Maqaalaat Mutanawwi‘ah, 13/373)

🍃Shaykh Muhammad al-Mukhtaar ash-Shanqeeti explained the difference of opinion and said:

“The salaf (early generations) disallowed that, and Imam Maalik (may Allah have mercy on him) was very strict on this matter and disallowed it. That was the way of the salaf, but later scholars and fuqaha’ issued fatwas stating that there is nothing wrong with it in these later times.

The reason for that is that in earlier times people were few and it was possible to see the family of the deceased in the masjid, or on the road or at the well, and offer condolences to them, and the matter was easy.

In fact you could say that if a person died, all the people of the village would know and would attend his burial, and offering condolences was easy.

But nowadays many people live in big cities and it is difficult to go to each relative in his own house; this causes such difficulty the extent of which only Allaah knows, and the matter is burdensome. Hence if they gather in the house of one of the relatives, that is easier for the people and easier for them, and it is more effective in achieving the purpose of offering condolences to all and consoling them all.

Hence they issued fatwas stating that in this case there is nothing wrong with them sitting (to receive condolences) and this is not regarded as coming under the heading of wailing (which is forbidden); rather it is prescribed because there is a need for it.”

(Silsilat Duroos Sharh az-Zaad 86/16).

🔹13. No soyum (third day),10th day or 40th day or anniversary celebrations

There’s NO PROOF from the Sharee’ah of holding gatherings of reading the Qur’aan for the deceased on the third day or tenth day or fortieth day or anniversary etc.

Many people died in the lifetime of the Prophet sal Allaahu Alayhi wa sallam.

But he never held such gatherings. And neither did the Sahaabah.

If it was good then surely they would have done it.

But they didn’t.

🔹 14. Family and neighbors should bring the food

📌 Proof:

🍃 When Ja’far radhi Allaahu anhu was killed, the Prophet sal Allaahu Alayhi wa sallam went to his family and said:

“The family of Ja’far are busy with the matter of their deceased, so prepare food for them.’ (Ibn Majah - hasan by al-Albaani)

🍃 Shaikh ibn Baaz said:

“It is not permitted for the family to (especially) make food for people because for the sake of the deceased.

This is one of the actions of the Jaahiliyyah, whether it is done on the day of the death, or on the fourth or tenth day after the death, or at the new year. All of that is not permitted.

But if guests come to the family of the deceased during the mourning period, there is nothing wrong with them making food for them for the sake of hospitality, and there is nothing wrong with the household inviting whoever they want of their neighbors and relatives to eat with them from the food that has been given to them.” (Majmoo’ Fataawa)

🔹 15. No putting the Mus-haf (the Qur’aan book) on the dead body or covering the bier with a cloth that has Aayaat or la ilaaha illallaah or other Surahs written on it.

🍃 Shaikh ibn Baaz said:

“This should not be done, and we should warn against that, because that exposes the Qur’aanic verses to inappropriate treatment, and because some people may think that this will benefit the deceased, which is a serious mistake for which there is no basis in sharee’ah.” (Majallat Al-Buhooth Al-Islamiyyah, 68/36, 37)

🔹16. When to offer condolences?

Condolences can be offered at ANY time.

There’s no specific time limit for doing that.

🍃 Shaikh Ibn Baaz said:

“With regard to offering condolences, there are no set days for doing so.

It is prescribed from the time that the soul leaves the body, before the funeral prayer and afterwards. There is no time limit set for that in sharee’ah.

Condolences may be offered at night or during the day, in the home, on the street, in the masjid, in the graveyard or anywhere else.”

(Majmoo’ Fataawa Wa Maqaalaat Mutanawwi’ah Li Samaahat Vol. 8, P. 362)

And Allaah knows best