by Asma bint Shameem
Okay...so it's that time of the year again, when they say that 'love' is in the air.
The time when you see 'RED' everywhere....red hearts, red candy, red flowers, and red balloons.
And when you walk into the stores you see chocolates, and teddy bears and jewelry and gifts for 'that someone special you know'.
This is the time when the old and the young, and even kids, as young as those in elementary school, exchange valentine cards and 'love notes' amongst themselves.
And why is all this?
Because it's "Valentine's Day"...that's why.
But the sad reality is, that even us Muslims are doing this.
And its not just in the West.
Those living in Muslim countries are just as involved. They too, are exchanging cards and gifts and love notes.
They too, are celebrating Valentine's Day.
But what is this "Valentine's Day" after all?
Have we ever thought about it? What's the story behind it?
What does celebrating "Valentine's Day" really mean?
Where does this fit in a Muslim's life?
Does it even fit in it at all?
Looking at the Qur'aan and Sunnah, one should realize that we should not be celebrating Valentine's Day in the first place, because it is a celebration of the non-Muslims with PAGAN/christian roots.
More information on it may be found on various web sites.
But the point of this article is not to prove where this celebration “originated” from; rather it is to assert that this celebration is not part of our Deen.
Whatever we need to celebrate has been prescribed to us by Allaah and His Messenger (Sal Allaahu Alaiyhi wa sallam) and it is prohibited to celebrate anything else.
🍃That is why Allaah said:
لِكُلِّ أُمَّةٍ جَعَلْنَا مَنسَكًا هُمْ نَاسِكُوهُ
"For every nation We have ordained religious ceremonies which they must follow." [Surah al-Hajj:67]
🍃 And the Prophet (Sal Allaahu Alaiyhi wa sallam) said:
'Every nation has its own Eid (celebration) and this is our Eid (meaning Eid al-Fitr and Eid al-Adha).' (al-Bukhaari, Muslim)
But, even if this specific command was not there, it still would not be appropriate for a Muslim to celebrate Valentine's Day.
Why is that?
Because, if you really think about it, what this day promotes and revolves around, goes against the very basic principles of Islaam.
What this day encourages, cuts at the very roots of what our religion teaches us.
Let us see what some of these issues are:
🔺1. Allaah commands us to lower our gaze and not look at the opposite gender.
قُل لِّلْمُؤْمِنِينَ يَغُضُّوا مِنْ أَبْصَارِهِمْ وَيَحْفَظُوا فُرُوجَهُمْ
وَقُل لِّلْمُؤْمِنَاتِ يَغْضُضْنَ مِنْ أَبْصَارِهِنَّ وَيَحْفَظْنَ فُرُوجَهُنَّ
"Tell the believing men to lower their gaze and protect their private parts....And tell the believing women to lower their gaze, and protect their private parts..." Surah al-Noor :30-31)
But Valentine's Day encourages people to deliberately look and stare and SEEK OUT the 'one' that they find attractive and pick him/her as their valentine.
🔺 2. Allaah orders Muslim women not to talk unnecessarily or in a soft manner to strange men.
إِنِ اتَّقَيْتُنَّ فَلَا تَخْضَعْنَ بِالْقَوْلِ فَيَطْمَعَ الَّذِي فِي قَلْبِهِ مَرَضٌ
"....then be not soft in speech, lest he in whose heart is a disease (of hypocrisy, or evil desire for adultery) should be moved with desire"
(Surah al-Ahzaab :32)
Yet, for Valentine's Day, you see young men and women who are absolutely not mahram for one another in any way whatsoever, going way beyond this prohibition. Not only are they talking to each other in a soft and flirtatious way, they are right out expressing their so-called 'love' (in reality, lust) for each other.
🔺 3. A nonmahram man and a woman can NOT be alone together at any time.
The Prophet Sal Allaahu Alaiyhi wa sallam said:
"Whoever believes in Allaah and the Last Day, let him not be alone with a woman who has no mahram present, for the third one present will be the Shaytaan." (Ahmad -- saheeh by al-Albaani)
But those who celebrate Valentine's Day purposely seek to be alone with each other and go out on “dates” with each other while their Master and Creator says:
وَلاَ تَقْرَبُواْ الزِّنَى إِنَّهُ كَانَ فَاحِشَةً وَسَاء سَبِيلاً
"And come not near to unlawful sex. Verily, it is a Faahishah (i.e. anything that transgresses its limits: a great sin, and an evil way " (al-Isra' :32)
🔺 4. Even the pure and noble Sahaabah were not exempt.
Think about this. Who could be purer than the wives of the Prophet (Sal Allaahu Alaiyhi wa sallam) and who could be higher in taqwa than the Sahaabah?
Yet, even for those noble people, Allaah ordered them to screen themselves from the wives of the Prophet Sal Allaahu Alaiyhi wa sallam when they need to ask them something.
وَإِذَا سَأَلْتُمُوهُنَّ مَتَاعًا فَاسْأَلُوهُنَّ مِن وَرَاء حِجَابٍ ذَلِكُمْ أَطْهَرُ لِقُلُوبِكُمْ وَقُلُوبِهِنَّ
"And when you ask (the Prophet's wives) for anything you want, ask them from behind a screen, that is purer for your hearts and for their hearts."
(Surah al-Ahzaab: 53)
🔺 5. You cannot even TOUCH a non-mahram.
It is a SIN to touch a person who's not mahram for you. Yet, we belittle this sin and some of us are guilty of it almost every day. We think nothing of it.
The Prophet Sal Allaahu Alaiyhi wa sallam said:
"If one of you were to be stabbed in the head with an iron needle, that would be better for him than his touching a woman who is not permissible for him."
(al-Tabaraani --saheeh by al-Albaani)
Valentine's Day promotes much more than just touching.
It promotes hugging, kissing, cuddling and much more.
May Allaah protect us.
🔺 6. Real and TRUE love that is acceptable and allowed by Allaah is ONLY that between a husband and his wife.
وَمِنْ آيَاتِهِ أَنْ خَلَقَ لَكُم مِّنْ أَنفُسِكُمْ أَزْوَاجًا لِّتَسْكُنُوا إِلَيْهَا وَجَعَلَ بَيْنَكُم مَّوَدَّةً وَرَحْمَةً إِنَّ فِي ذَلِكَ لَآيَاتٍ لِّقَوْمٍ يَتَفَكَّرُونَ
"And of His signs is that He created for you wives from among yourselves, that you might reside with them, and has put love and mercy between you. Surely, there are signs in this for those who THINK." (al-Room: 21)
Allaah is telling me and you to THINK and REFLECT on this ayah and appreciate the relationship of a husband and wife.
But Valentine's Day endorses haraam relationships between a nonmahram man and woman and encourages illicit love and un-Islaamic affiliations. A'oodhu billaah.
🔺 7. Hayaa' (modesty) and bashfulness are a jewel to be treasured.
Hayaa' is a purity and innocence that is a virtue, regardless for a man or a woman.
In fact, Hayaa' is part of our Imaan.
The Prophet Sal Allaahu Alaiyhi wa sallam said:
"Hayaa' (modesty) is a branch of faith." (Bukhaari)
On the other hand, this Valentine's day advocates nothing but shamelessness and immodesty. Young men and women who have no hayaa for Allaah, leave alone for each other, openly and shamelessly, ask each other to 'be their love' or be their 'valentine'.
And many of our youth are sad and upset and have a 'depressed Facebook status "that they don't have a valentine or boyfriend/girlfriend"!
OBJECTIONS !!!
🔺a) But....EVERYONE is doing it❗️
Just because everyone is doing something, does not mean that we should do it too, nor does it imply in any way that its okay to do it.
We should adhere to the limits set by Allaah, and not transgress them just because 'everyone is doing it'.
Allaah tells us:
وَإِن تُطِعْ أَكْثَرَ مَن فِي الْأَرْضِ يُضِلُّوكَ عَن سَبِيلِ اللَّهِ إِن يَتَّبِعُونَ إِلَّا الظَّنَّ وَإِنْ هُمْ إِلَّا يَخْرُصُونَ
"And if you obey most of those on earth, they will mislead you far away from Allah's Path. They follow nothing but conjectures, and they do nothing but lie."
(Surah al-An'aam:116)
🔺b) But...what if it's between husband and wife?
Even if this celebration is between a husband and wife, it is still not right for us to do so because it is a celebration of the non-Muslims.
And of course, if it is an illicit relationship, then obviously it’s even worse!
🔴 Conclusion:
We, as Muslims, should not be celebrating Valentine's Day; it is simply NOT allowed for us to do so. Everything that this day revolves around and is associated with is totally against the pure and pristine teachings of Allaah and His Messenger Sal Allaahu Alaiyhi wa sallam.
One shouldn't even congratulate one another or commemorate this day in any way, shape or form.
May Allah guide us and enable us to be true Muslims who submit earnestly and sincerely to Allaah and His Orders. Ameen.
Reflect on these beautiful verses below.
And if you TRULY reflect, everything will be clear.
يَا أَيُّهَا الَّذِينَ آمَنُوا اتَّقُوا اللَّهَ وَلْتَنظُرْ نَفْسٌ مَّا قَدَّمَتْ لِغَدٍ وَاتَّقُوا اللَّهَ إِنَّ اللَّهَ خَبِيرٌ بِمَا تَعْمَلُونَ
"O you who believe! Fear Allaah and keep your duty to Him. And let every person look to what he has sent forth for tomorrow, and fear Allaah. Verily, Allaah is All-Aware of what you do." (Surah al-Hashr:18)
And Allaah knows best.
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